"The most important thing I look for in a musician is the quality of his
listening." Duke Ellington
Each time I start to coach a new client I am fascinated to find out who they
are. I know that the 'self' they show will be part, but by no means all, of who
they are.
As we work together I'll ask about what they like to do when they are not
working. So often, this is their hidden hinterland. It's a window on the
person and a resource. It is, afterall, what they choose to do and there is
energy in it for them.
My clients have been secret jazz singers, inspired gardeners and avid
golfers. The jazz singers know about performance and improvisation. The
gardeners know about nurturing growth and the importance of situation.
The golfers know about how to deliver under pressure. One of my clients
told me that he was a straight-down-the-line, play-it-by-the-numbers sort
of guy with no creativity. And then he divulged that he customised big
motor-bikes and rode them with pride through his sleepy village. So, when
he got stuck I could ask what he would do if the issue were a bike
project. He quickly found his creativity and shifted. He also discovered
that his repertoire was much wider than he imagined and that was
significant learning.
I try to apply these insights to myself as a coach. From playing the blues, I
have learnt that to play well you need to play with freedom; silence is
musical, it's part of the rhythm and gives others space to play; when my
attention is on myself I don't make good music; when I am dissonant I need
to be totally committed to it; practising alone is not rehearsing together,
rehearsing together is not performing, but each supports the other; very
occasionally the music plays the musicians and then magic happens; to
attain mastery you much learn, practise and commit; and mastery brings
relaxation, confidence and resourcefulness and they allow you to play with
freedom.
And if I apply all this learning then I am doing well as a coach - so
long as I remember the words of one of my favourite coaching gurus:
"When I've played from my mind, I get in trouble" Stevie Ray Vaughn
